I've returned from a lovely (and much needed time out) weekend in LA where we visited our son and daughter-in-law. Only once did I get a phone call from our Denver son that Mom had fallen again (it's always on the weekend) and that she was OK. He and our older grandson had biked over to visit Mom and Dad. Very nice of them.
Arriving home on Monday, I went over to visit in the afternoon where I met Dad in Mom's unit and we did the afternoon exercise class. There was Dad sitting next to Mom, me in the back, and the residents moving our arms to Theresa Brewer's song, "Put another nickel in, in the nickelodean. All I want is loving you and music, music, music." One of the residents asked if the lady in the black sweater (moi) was going to stay or leave. I wasn't sure whether she liked the idea of me staying or she didn't. Resolution to myself: I plan to be less visible in the future. The residents need calm, not a person who loves Theresa Brewer's music so much that she has to sing it out loud.
I visit marketing after I remember I have to let them know whether I want Mom to move. They have already moved on and the only decision left I express the next day when I ask them if the next time around, we can move Mom into the less expensive space. Oh, the guilt about spending too much money.
Dad needs milk so I make a quick run to the grocery store with him before dropping him back home and waiting for my California cousin to arrive for an overnight stay.
My cousin, who at one time lived with Mom and Dad, has come for a visit. Their reunion in Mom's unit brings tears to my eyes. She is so gentle and loving with them both, helping Mom go to the restroom and pouring over old picture albums with Dad in his apartment.
We drop my cousin off at another cousin's home. My dad and she have not seen each other in nine years and it is a charming reunion between two aging people who, though they may not have seen each other for many years, have much in common these days.
I vow to spend a minimum amount of time visiting this week. Everyone's been talking to me about how I need to make them less reliant on me. We'll see.